Space negotiation in confined seating is a balancing act between comfort and good relations. This is not to pretend you’re involved in anything other than a zero-sum land grab – this is a literal arms race, but we’re discussing etiquette.
Look to international relations – US-China is a good model. Civility is paramount. Gradual encroachment is key. Get in behind their elbow. If you lose the higher ground, wait for their inevitable trip to the toilet. OK, it’s not exactly like international relations.
Passengers with special dietary needs get served first, so it pays to be one, or at least say you are. It’s queue jumping, yes, but it’s very hard to get caught. Of course, you may not be the only pretend vegetarian or kosher-requiring charlatan on board. To really jump the queue, tell them you’re a bean-intolerant milk-swerver who can’t eat sugar or salt. Your food will be awful, but you probably deserve that.
Anyone who buys any sort of priority boarding privilege is an oily, money-palmed weasel. People with physical difficulties should get on first, everyone else should just wait. The rule is compounded when flying budget airlines, where such “better than you” hypocrisy will almost certainly be met with a strategically deployed Knee Defender© – or it would if the seats reclined, which they don’t.
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Restless-legged children kicking the upholstery off the back of your chair, tinny hip-hop leaking from headphones, grown men in sombreros happy-slapping each other, are all perils of flight. The mature thing would be a discreet conversation between parties, leading to a happy compromise. But screw that awkwardness. The cabin crew are your personal secret police, expert at meting out polite cease and desists. Go rat to them, and avoid frosty stares and “accidental” chair bumps for the rest of the flight. Speaking of which …
You’re not George Clooney; you have very dry skin and are wearing compression socks. You’re not on Concorde in the 70s, and the cabin crew are not geishas.
They’re there to keep you safe. You don’t wink at your GP, or a hygiene inspector, so now is also not the time to pull out a feeble line about special access to your cockpit. Do think about adjacent passengers, who you’ve just invited to imagine your frustrated onanism. No one wants to witness a crash and burn, especially on a plane.
You’re not George Clooney; you have very dry skin and are wearing compression socks. You’re not on Concorde in the 70s, and the cabin crew are not geishas.
They’re there to keep you safe. You don’t wink at your GP, or a hygiene inspector, so now is also not the time to pull out a feeble line about special access to your cockpit. Do think about adjacent passengers, who you’ve just invited to imagine your frustrated onanism. No one wants to witness a crash and burn, especially on a plane.
http://www.debtfreeamerica.com/UserProfile/tabid/82/UserId/120556/Default.aspx
Nobody over six feet tall is surprised that a couple of passengers got into a fight on a United flight from Newark to Denver over the use of a gadget called Knee Defender — two small, wedge-like devices that prevent the seat in front of you from reclining. The passenger using the device, a guy seated in a middle row, refused to remove it when the woman seated in front of him tried to recline. Words were exchanged; then a cup of water was hurled aft. The flight was diverted to Chicago, and the two were removed.
More
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Me, I’m with Knee Defender guy.
I don’t travel with a Knee Defender, but I do travel with knees. Just being an airline passengers makes everyone cranky to begin with. Being 6 ft. 2 in. and long of leg, I’m in a near rage by the time I wedge myself into a coach seat. And now you want to jam your chair back into my knees for four hours? Go fly a kite. It’s an airline seat, not a lounge chair. You want comfort, buy a business class seat. What’s surprising is that there haven’t been more fights over Knee Defender. Or perhaps these incidents haven’t been reported. I’ve gotten into it a few times with people in front of me who insist that the space over my knees is theirs, as if they have some kind of air rights. And I’m sure I will again.
United says it has a no Knee Defender policy, although the device is allowable on other carriers. My own knee defense is this: As soon as the seatbelt sign goes off and people are free to annoy me, I wedge my knees against the seat in front of me. Any attempted move back is met with resistance. (Very good exercise, too.) At first, the person in front thinks there’s something wrong with his chair and tries again, meeting like resistance. Then there’s that backward glance, and the dirty look. I smile and say: “Sorry, those are my knees. And I’m not moving them.” Secretly I am saying, “If you try to move that seat back again I’m going over the top of your chair and strangling you.” Did I mention that flying is infuriating?
This has led to some very unfriendly exchanges on the friendly skies of United and elsewhere. And should my adversary, during an unguarded moment, manage to intrude into my space, there’s always the opportunity to resort to 8-year-old mode, accidentally kicking the chair every once in a while. If I’m not going to be comfortable, you’re not.
Yes, it’s not the most civil behavior, but United and other airlines brought this about by treating us like cargo. Consider the situation on Flight 1462. United runs 737s, among the smallest in the Boeing fleet, out of Newark to distant places. It’s four hours to Denver from Newark. The coach seats are 17.3 inches wide. The pitch is 31 inches in Economy and 34 inches in the so-called Economy Plus, where the dueling pair was sitting. Economy Plus used to be called by another name, Economy, until the carriers started adding rows and squeezing the space. This fight started because the guy was trying to work on his laptop. You can’t use a laptop when the seat in front of you is in your lap. And it’s only getting worse when you realize that the proportion of flights longer than two hours that now use commuter jets is growing.
Personally, my policy is to not recline, even if the seat does. I’m trying to respect the space of the passenger behind me. So please respect mine, or be prepared for a bumpy ride.
Look to international relations – US-China is a good model. Civility is paramount. Gradual encroachment is key. Get in behind their elbow. If you lose the higher ground, wait for their inevitable trip to the toilet. OK, it’s not exactly like international relations.
Passengers with special dietary needs get served first, so it pays to be one, or at least say you are. It’s queue jumping, yes, but it’s very hard to get caught. Of course, you may not be the only pretend vegetarian or kosher-requiring charlatan on board. To really jump the queue, tell them you’re a bean-intolerant milk-swerver who can’t eat sugar or salt. Your food will be awful, but you probably deserve that.
Anyone who buys any sort of priority boarding privilege is an oily, money-palmed weasel. People with physical difficulties should get on first, everyone else should just wait. The rule is compounded when flying budget airlines, where such “better than you” hypocrisy will almost certainly be met with a strategically deployed Knee Defender© – or it would if the seats reclined, which they don’t.
http://www.onapps.net/UserProfile/tabid/61/userId/67428/Default.aspx
Restless-legged children kicking the upholstery off the back of your chair, tinny hip-hop leaking from headphones, grown men in sombreros happy-slapping each other, are all perils of flight. The mature thing would be a discreet conversation between parties, leading to a happy compromise. But screw that awkwardness. The cabin crew are your personal secret police, expert at meting out polite cease and desists. Go rat to them, and avoid frosty stares and “accidental” chair bumps for the rest of the flight. Speaking of which …
You’re not George Clooney; you have very dry skin and are wearing compression socks. You’re not on Concorde in the 70s, and the cabin crew are not geishas.
They’re there to keep you safe. You don’t wink at your GP, or a hygiene inspector, so now is also not the time to pull out a feeble line about special access to your cockpit. Do think about adjacent passengers, who you’ve just invited to imagine your frustrated onanism. No one wants to witness a crash and burn, especially on a plane.
You’re not George Clooney; you have very dry skin and are wearing compression socks. You’re not on Concorde in the 70s, and the cabin crew are not geishas.
They’re there to keep you safe. You don’t wink at your GP, or a hygiene inspector, so now is also not the time to pull out a feeble line about special access to your cockpit. Do think about adjacent passengers, who you’ve just invited to imagine your frustrated onanism. No one wants to witness a crash and burn, especially on a plane.
http://www.debtfreeamerica.com/UserProfile/tabid/82/UserId/120556/Default.aspx
Nobody over six feet tall is surprised that a couple of passengers got into a fight on a United flight from Newark to Denver over the use of a gadget called Knee Defender — two small, wedge-like devices that prevent the seat in front of you from reclining. The passenger using the device, a guy seated in a middle row, refused to remove it when the woman seated in front of him tried to recline. Words were exchanged; then a cup of water was hurled aft. The flight was diverted to Chicago, and the two were removed.
More
The Knee Defender Is Cheating—And Of Course Guys Love ItThe California Quake May Cost Wine Country BillionsIvory Atrocity: Crime Groups Speed Elephant Slaughter NBC NewsShooting Range Instructor Killed by Girl With Uzi NBC NewsAmerican Freed by Militants in Syria Back in U.S. NBC News
Me, I’m with Knee Defender guy.
I don’t travel with a Knee Defender, but I do travel with knees. Just being an airline passengers makes everyone cranky to begin with. Being 6 ft. 2 in. and long of leg, I’m in a near rage by the time I wedge myself into a coach seat. And now you want to jam your chair back into my knees for four hours? Go fly a kite. It’s an airline seat, not a lounge chair. You want comfort, buy a business class seat. What’s surprising is that there haven’t been more fights over Knee Defender. Or perhaps these incidents haven’t been reported. I’ve gotten into it a few times with people in front of me who insist that the space over my knees is theirs, as if they have some kind of air rights. And I’m sure I will again.
United says it has a no Knee Defender policy, although the device is allowable on other carriers. My own knee defense is this: As soon as the seatbelt sign goes off and people are free to annoy me, I wedge my knees against the seat in front of me. Any attempted move back is met with resistance. (Very good exercise, too.) At first, the person in front thinks there’s something wrong with his chair and tries again, meeting like resistance. Then there’s that backward glance, and the dirty look. I smile and say: “Sorry, those are my knees. And I’m not moving them.” Secretly I am saying, “If you try to move that seat back again I’m going over the top of your chair and strangling you.” Did I mention that flying is infuriating?
This has led to some very unfriendly exchanges on the friendly skies of United and elsewhere. And should my adversary, during an unguarded moment, manage to intrude into my space, there’s always the opportunity to resort to 8-year-old mode, accidentally kicking the chair every once in a while. If I’m not going to be comfortable, you’re not.
Yes, it’s not the most civil behavior, but United and other airlines brought this about by treating us like cargo. Consider the situation on Flight 1462. United runs 737s, among the smallest in the Boeing fleet, out of Newark to distant places. It’s four hours to Denver from Newark. The coach seats are 17.3 inches wide. The pitch is 31 inches in Economy and 34 inches in the so-called Economy Plus, where the dueling pair was sitting. Economy Plus used to be called by another name, Economy, until the carriers started adding rows and squeezing the space. This fight started because the guy was trying to work on his laptop. You can’t use a laptop when the seat in front of you is in your lap. And it’s only getting worse when you realize that the proportion of flights longer than two hours that now use commuter jets is growing.
Personally, my policy is to not recline, even if the seat does. I’m trying to respect the space of the passenger behind me. So please respect mine, or be prepared for a bumpy ride.
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